All right, why is that woman wearing safety goggles?

That’s Goggle Woman, Mark.

Yeah, you don’t know about her?

No, what, or who, is Goggle Woman?

(continue reading…)

I got a new job!

Whatcha doin’?

I’m gonna train monkeys.

Wait, what?

(continue reading…)

Have you ever been tased?

What? No! And I swear, if you pull a taser out of your pocket and tase me I’ll kill you later.

I am not going to tase you.

Then why are you asking me?

(continue reading…)

I got a taco!

Which is good, since you ordered a taco.

It isn’t like I forgot what I ordered, Jake!

Just making sure!

(continue reading…)

Oh, snap!

Dude?

Wasssssup!

Shot down.

(continue reading…)

Well, it was what I wanted now.

And if we’re the victims of the night…

I won’t be blinded by light!

Just call me angel of the morning, angel.

(continue reading…)

Whoever invented the Cheerio was a genius.

Cheerios really are a work of art, aren’t they?

Does anyone not like Cheerios?

Why aren’t there world religions devoted to this stuff?

(continue reading…)

I love a good pedicure, don’t you?

This is relaxing, I’ll admit.

Mmm. And then we can get the waxing, yes?

No thank you.

(continue reading…)