Did you ever get your watch fixed?

Huh? No, you know, I didn’t.

Maybe you should do that.

Naw.

(continue reading…)

So Godzilla.

Yeah, man, you’re right, that guy is totally so Godzilla.

What?

I thought you were inventing a new term for people.

(continue reading…)

Wanna hear a joke?

Sure.

It’s kinda dirty.

Good!

(continue reading…)

You know they wanted a pony, right?

Yeah.

Just making sure.

Is there a problem with the pony?

(continue reading…)

We need more kids who get superpowers by screaming someone’s name.

How many do we need?

I don’t know we have, what, one?

Captain Marvel, you mean.

(continue reading…)

I think I should buy a pet monkey.

They’re illegal to own as pets in NY.

Is that right?

Pretty sure.

(continue reading…)

Hey.

Hey.

What’s up?

Uhm, Mark? Take the next urinal, huh?

(continue reading…)

You know when I was a kid I used to think the pan flute…

Was awesome?

That too! But I thought it was a flute and a pan.

How could that even…

I know! But the name made me think it was a frying pan that had a flute attached!

(continue reading…)