So I was out with this guy the other night…
Was he cute?
Not the point.
That’s a yes, so the date was going well.
At first.
Oh no!
But he kept telling me all about his ex.
Why do people always make that mistake?
I wish I knew. I mean, there we are, having dinner and he’s telling me how his ex was allergic to shellfish.
Were you having shellfish at least?
Oh, yeah. But even so…
Truth’s. I used to like to think that they did it to try and bond. To tell me about their scars so that I would be impressed.
I never thought of it like that.
Well, I tried to, for a time, but eventually I realized that was wrong.
It’s just their inability to let go.
I thought that too, but then I had a different idea.
Hit me.
They talk about their exes endlessly because they’re nervous. They like us, they want the date to go well, but they’re nervous.
And they think that telling us about exes will make it better?
No. But they don’t know what to say, what to do, so they try to relate. To go back over what happened last time.
But they do it out loud.
Nervousness.
No! You do not get to make me feel bad for that sort of behavior! That’s unfair.
Oh no! Now you’ll go on another date and some guy will start telling you about his exes and you’ll be understanding!
I don’t wanna be!
You’ll see past it and excuse it and have a second date!
Nooooo!
Have you ever, though?
Had a second date? That’s harsh.
No, gone out with someone who’s done the ex move with you and then had a second date with them.
Actually no.
Me either.
But you’re understanding about it, I thought.
No, dearling, I understand it. I am not understanding. If they can’t hold it together for a single date, chances are they would never be able to cope with me.
True enough!
did you just call me difficult?
I agreed with you, calling yourself difficult.
That may be as bad.
Yeah, if I were you I would be angry at myself for a while over that. I might even hold a grudge against myself.
You are a very bad boy, Mark.
Which is why I’m not going to ask this guy out for a second date.
Touché!
