I think I saw Pee-wee Herman earlier.

Wow! Really?

Yeah, over on Broadway. Down about Astor.

Did you say hi, or something?

I did not.

And that angers you?

Damn it! Pee-wee Herman stole my pants!

What?! He what?

Stole my pants. Pee-wee did.

The ones you were wearing? Pee-wee Herman accosted you, pantsed you and ran off?

No, not the pants I had on! What? No!

You had spare pants just for stealing? That’s thinking ahead.

I was on my way back from the dry cleaners.

And you had pants!

And I had pants.

That were recently dry-cleaned.

Yes, exactly.

And then Pee-wee Herman ran up to you and stole them.

Well, not quite. Then a guy who looked like Pee-wee Herman…

When you say looked like, do you mean an impersonator?

I don’t think so. I’m not sure, of course, but no, I think he was just a guy who looked like Pee-wee and dressed like him.

So it might have been the real Pee-wee?

I refuse to believe that, and yet at the same time, will always allow for speculation.

Good plan! So he stole your pants?

Walked right by me and while I was confused by his raw Pee-wee-ness…

Pee-wee-osity?

Pee-wee-atude! While I was distracted by it, he grabbed the dry cleaning right out of my hand and ran off!

What did you do?

I shouted for him to stop, I started to run after him, but he ran down into the train station and got on a train.

Once you let that Pee-wee slip by you, he’s just too fast to catch.

I lost a good pair of pants to that guy.

You should’ve challenged him to dance. Then he would have had to stop and do the dance!

Stupid Pee-wee Herman looking guy.

You got your pants stolen by someone who was possibly Pee-wee Herman. Isn’t that story worth more than a pair of pants?

No.

No?

All right maybe!

That’s what I thought!