This is how I want to spend every Saturday from now on.

Oh, dearling, it would get boring.

Eventually. But a few hundred afternoons laying in the sun, on the beach, no, I’ll risk the boredom.

Fair enough.

Look at you two slackers. Just sitting there.

And what are you doing?

Trying to learn from the masters?

All right then.

It’s early yet, Jacob, for now all of my energy is being used just sitting here. And watching Melina.

That whole scared of “swimming at night” really was just a night thing, wasn’t it?

I think she’s part mermaid during the day.

We should join her. Eventually.

My thought exactly. Just not yet. I’m not done yet. The world is my Holly Hobby Oven and I have heard no ding!

Hey, is she all right?

What do you mean, of course she is … oh hells. Mark, get her?

Yup.

Owwww!

honey, what happened?

OW!

Yes, dearling I understood that but what happened?

She’s bleeding a bit!

Good lord, Melly Mel?

I was swimming and then… a wave… and I hit bottom and…

Here, honey, let me…

What are you…?!

She’ll be fine. Jacob, go get me some gauze and bandages from the bathroom inside, please?

Yup.

Melina, it’s just a bit of coral.

In my butt cheek?!

That’s exactly where it is, Melly. Just a tiny bit. It’ll be all right.

She pulled down my bottoms! I’m on a beach and my bare ass is in the air! And I’m bleeding and it hurts!

It’s all right, dearling, no one can see anything.

You guys can see my ass, and my junk and … OW! OWWwwww!

That got the coral out. Jacob will be back with something to cover the wound in a second.

You won’t need stitches at least.

Here, is she all right?

She’s fine, just put some gauze there and…

Don’t look at my ass or my junk, Jacob!

I won’t Mel. Just stop squirming.

You should go and wash that off and rebandage it.

Yes, stand up, honey.

Not without my pants!

Melina! I am not going to put wet, saltwater soaked bottoms against you, and have it soak the bandage and hurt you more! Now stand up.

I dun’ wanna.

Here, Mel, here. I got you a towel. We can wrap it around you.

Thank you.

Now go inside and wash it off. Jacob, dearling, go with her and help?

Uhh…

Melina you don’t want all three of us to keep seeing your rear end, correct?

No.

Jacob, go with her. We’ll be right behind you.

Come on, Mel.

This sucks.

It does.

Natasha, why did you send Jake off with her? I mean, why Jake?

Because eventually I would’ve gotten angry at her, being upset that we were looking at her bottom, or something. And you would not have put peroxide on the cut because she will cry and you are too much of a soft touch.

Hey!

It’s true, dealing. Jacob will be fine.

It hurts, Jake.

I know. Ok, you’re going to have to drop the towel. Here, bend over the sink.

Don’t look.

Mel.

Well, you know what I mean.

Don’t take notes. No problem. All right. I have to wash this out and then rebandage it. It’s gonna sting.

Awww man.

I know.

She can yelp, can’t she?

Healthy lungs on her. But, dearling, you know she’ll be fine. Why do we not make a lunch? She can’t go back in the saltwater, so let us cheer her up?

Yeah, we have ice cream. And I can make some waffles?

Perfect.

You’re looking at my junk.

Mel, seriously, I’m not. Not like it hangs down like a guy’s junk. I’m just focused on your ass. I mean…

Hahaha ok, that was… oh Jake.

I meant your wound.

Really that’s it? I mean I’m bent over a sink, legs apart, bare-assed…

Mel! If you keep going on like that you’re gonna make me look.

Hmph, well you’ve seen it before, right?

Oh, come on, that an accident and months ago anyway and … oh, you shave now?

Oh my god! Jacob!

You kept bringing it up!

Are we done or do you want to keep humiliating me?

I didn’t mean to…

I know, it’s just…

And now I can’t not look.

Jacob!

Well! All right, you’re done. Here is your towel.

Thank you.

No problem.

Do you smell waffles?

I do smell waffles.

I think Mark is making waffles!

To cheer you up, probably. We should go get you some food. You’ve lost a teeny tiny bit of blood, after all. That means you need to eat waffles, I think.

I think it does! Hooray waffles! Let’s… uhm… Jacob?

Yeah, Mel?

Uhm. Remember that whole you can’t help but look problem?

I’m sorry about that! I just… what are you… oh god.

No, it’s all right, Jake, it is.

Oh my god.

Those trunks don’t hide anything, do they?

Mel!

Jacob, it’s all right. Sort of flattering, even. But we should wait to go out and eat waffles.

Oh man!

Awww, Jacob, it’s all right. I know how you feel, come on, this was me five minutes ago right? It’s fine!

Thanks, Mel, but the big squeezy hug? Not helping.

No, probably not. Uhm. I’ll go get waffles. You…

I’ll be out in a minute, I have to clean up the bathroom.

Good idea. Think about baseball.

I hate you, sometimes, Melina.

Well, you’re my hero. Not very virtuous, I guess, but… waffles!

Waffles! What took you guys so long?

Jacob has to clean up in there. Bits of gauze and blood everywhere. But that’s fine. Waffles?

All better if there are waffles, huh?

And ice cream?

And ice cream.

Woo! Thanks guys!

TO BE CONTINUED.